In retrospect (26 March 2015)

Regrets are something I may have mentioned before…….. but they are a constant factor with people I’m coaching, and maybe with life. If only I’d done this or that, in retrospect I should’ve taken this or that option, I missed my chance. A recent client appears to regret every decision she has made since being born; though she is a senior manager with a well-known company, has a good salary, two children, a comfortable salary, a husband who seems to love and care for her.

Problem is – it is the things she does not have that make her regret the choices she has made, not the things she has; and it is now, this moment, that is at the front of her mind, not the life she has led to this point.

She is also in her 50s; a classic age, especially now we are all living longer, when we start to think: what have I missed? That is one reason, I think, why divorce is becoming very common for people in their 50s in the UK. A danger, at this point, is that people may make rash decisions, leading to more regrets. Ho hum!

So if you are at this tipping point yourself, try a No-Lose decision:
• Assess, honestly, your options, including staying on the same path
• Give yourself time and space
• Be true to your values and beliefs in making a decision
• Once you have made the decision, commit to it, make it work, enjoy the change
• Difficulties will arise; overcome them, blame no-one else, this is what you wanted – don’t protect it, do correct it
• Enjoy your new life! And no regrets, please – take responsibility, this is your decision

All the best


PS: I recently referred back in my blog to my misbegotten youth, when I discovered the rock band Free. Sadly, the bassist Andy Fraser died very recently. Listen to Mr Big to understand what he was capable of with a bass guitar in his hands. Thanks, Andy - email: - tel: + (44) (0) 7890 360 806 - skype: tigercoaching1